The Israel Lobby vs. Dasha Nekrasova’s Fearsome Simp Army

Cranky, whiny-voiced neurotic Mark Levin and spastic yarmulked motormouth Ben Shapiro have put conservatives on notice: the Israel lobby (which, they added, isn’t actually real and even if it were real, isn’t truly all that powerful, especially when compared to the massively stacked-and-packed Qatar Lobby, and if you have any other impression that’s just cuz you’re a vicious and bloodthirsty antisemite) is about to crack down on conservatives who are insufficiently enthused about Israel’s relentless bombing of the civilian population of Gaza.

“Whaddya mean we don’t cancel people?” Levin sneered at a gathering last week, in a vitriolic speech in which, in his trademark nasal Maxwell Smart-esque patois , he proudly rattled off a list of men he saw fit to ruin, for the crime of believing that American soldiers shouldn’t intervene on Israel’s behalf in Middle Eastern wars.

Now, he announced, he and his powerful friends— though again, he hastened to add, we aren’t allowed to call them powerful, because drawing attention to their (real) power is apparently an antisemitic trope— intended to “take names” of the sort of people who were saying the wrong things about Israel, or even “platforming” others with a negative take on the United States’ rather one-sided alliance with their ethnic homeland. Recent prominent dissidents Tucker Carlson, Candace Owens, and Nick Fuentes were put on particular notice.

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Earlier this week, the “whaddya mean we don’t cancel people” machine took its first scalp: actress Dasha Nekrasova, co-host of the “Red Scare” podcast, which hosted Fuentes on an episode of their show back in October, was unceremoniously fired from her talent agency as well as being dropped from the cast of a new film titled Iconoclast.

But the Israel Lobby little know, or understand, the sleeping giant they have awakened.

The Dasha simp army has been ACTIVATED.

These are the guys who, if you dare to mess with their pale, blonde, Slavic queen, turn more fearfully feral than ISIS on a bad day.

The terrors of which they are capable are not even to be fathomed. Forget Hamas, forget Hezbollah. Hell hath no fury like a legion of militant simps maliciously mobilized for maximum mayhem.

“We will fight, at an hour of our choosing, in a manner perfectly suited to exact the greatest damage imaginable,” said one of Dasha’s knights, who chooses to remain anonymous.

“I serve the Queen, my designation is unimportant, but know that there are many more like me,” he continued. “Know that we will not stop until our queen’s good name has been restored. The wicked wizards of the Izzy Lobby had best stop in their tracks, beat an immediate retreat, and cut their losses… or they will face carnage of epic proportions. Dare I say, another…”

(At that moment, his words were cut off by the mighty sound of a thousand horses’ hoofs as the hearty simp army rode off to battle.)

https://andynowicki.substack.com/p/the-israel-lobby-vs-the-dasha-nekrasovas